Life always seems to be like this, doesn’t it?  There’s something you want to go accomplish, do, buy, write, build, etc…. yet turns out it’s “not yet time.”

The question I struggle with is why are we presented with an opportunity for something we want and then ultimately have to wait much longer than we expected to finally get it.

Is it so we appreciate it that much more when it finally does happen?  So we don’t just take it for granted and toss it aside like a child does with a new toy?

Is it a matter of maturity?  Are we initially presented with the thought or opportunity to test our maturity and patience?  Or if we don’t ultimately get it, is it that we actually didn’t take advantage of the opportunity when it was presented to us?  Is it that we didn’t do the right thing at the right time?  Did it just slip through our hands without us even knowing it?

Was it that we were never really “qualified” for the opportunity and we were just wishful thinking we could live and operate on such a high level.

Is someone playing an awful trick on us, kind of like what has happened to Manti Te’o recently?  (To which I must add – doing something like that to someone else is really messed up, and how the rest of the world reacted to it is even more messed up.  I want to write about it but would end up using a lot of 4-letter words.   Not sure I want to go there…)

I believe there is proper “timing” for everything and sometimes it just “not the right time.”   I also believe hard work, dedication, patience and diligence is the path towards success so timing is inherent to success.

But dammit, it really gets old telling yourself, “Just keep waiting… it must not be the right time yet.”

Some days, it’s just hard.

Some days, you want someone to walk over to you, point a direction and say, “go that way, you’ll find it over there.”

Some days you want God to grab you by the head, look you in the eyes and tell you the truth, telling you how it will end and if it everything will be ok.

Some days the goal feels as far away as the mountain I see looking out the window from the ferry I ride into Seattle.  The crazy thing is the goal feels to never get much closer or any more clear than the view below.  I struggle with the juxtaposition of being a go-getter and making things happen vs being a farmer, planting seeds that will grow into future opportunities down the road.  Being a farmer is fine when last year’s crop is nicely feeding you and your family, allowing you to plan for your future patiently and wisely.  When it doesn’t, patience will be tested and wisdom can be challenged.

I hope today brings more than the normal “not yet” I seem to keep running into.